For Those Nursing Mothers Considering Weaning Your Babies ~ From me to You

Everyone in your home is sleeping peacefully, including your baby. You stir, knowing that the start of the day is fast approaching. In the midst of the quiet sounds of the morning, you hear the one that warms your heart the most. It's your baby. Moving, sniffing, grunting, turning from side to side and fussing a bit. He's awake and looking for you.

You resolve yourself to another busy day and make your way to your baby. Your breasts feel full and heavy and you look forward to the relief your baby will bring. Picking him up or moving him toward you, you bear your breast, and once again, find yourself amazed at his strong instinctive need as he stretches his tiny neck, reaching for you. You assist him in finding what he needs and he begins to feed. You feel the warm sensation of your milk releasing to him, and hear him hungrily swallowing. His body is relaxed, his eyes are closed . You snuggle in with him, feeling his warm body next to yours, and for a few moments you believe you and your baby are the only two people in the world.

This is something I have experienced with all my children. And each time was just as special as the first. With my first two babies, the mornings alone with them eventually turned into busy days at work. With my new little boy, I am experiencing the luxury of my busy day within the comfort of my home. Both demanding, requiring endurance, organization and travel. Working inside or outside of the home; the key word is work.

My oldest son is now ten years old. My daughter if five. As I have told you my new baby boy is 4 months old now. I know for a fact that the early years go by so fast. The speed of light ain't got nothin' on the rate at which a child grows. I know that life gets busy, and there are many things we all must do each day. But please hear me... Cherish each and every moment, don't force your babies to grow up to fast. If you are nursing and you are considering weaning your baby, let me address a few obstacles you may be facing and see if I can change your mind.

I want to have another baby:

Well, so do I. But you know what? I just had one. And if you're baby is less then one year old, so did you. There is absolutely nothing wrong with having your children close together, and if you are currently pregnant and you have a one year old or less to care for as well, this article is not written to criticize you in any way. Every baby is a blessing and they all come in their own time. But I would encourage you to eat your Wheaties.

Having said that, for the rest of you who are not yet pregnant and want to wean your current nursling because you are considering becoming pregnant, read on. It has been proven over and over again that breastmilk provides unmatched nutrition for the first year of life. The nursing relationship provides so many benefits, from good oral development, to good self esteem derived from the close relationship between mother and baby, all the way to a reduced risk of obesity later in life the longer the baby nurses. Your little one is still a baby. Enjoy him as much as you can, and think about the other darling when your first darling reaches one year of age. That way, you can nurse him for a year, get pregnant again and not feel to bad when your mature milk supply transitions to colostrum and your baby looks at you like you've lost your mind and wanders what happened to his food, and you're body will be much stronger and ready for the rigors of another pregnancy and delivery after having a full year to regenerate.

I have to work full time, and I am tired of pumping during my work day:

Now here goes nothing. Get ready to be shocked. My first two children weaned from the breast at nine months of age. That's right, me, the author of the soap box diaries, did not breastfeed her first two children for the entire first year. I intended to, I wanted to, but I did not. I had my reasons. The biggest was I had to work outside of the home. My children both decided at about six months, that the bottle was cooler because it was mobile. They could take it with them around the room while they just couldn't' get Mommy's boobies to come with them; and believe me they both tried. Over the course of about three months (between 6 and 9 months of age) they gradually weaned to the bottle.

My first two children went between bottle ad breast no problem. I had to work and sometimes my days were long. I pumped religiously, and it was worth it. But at the time, I took my babies love for the bottle as a sign they didn't need me anymore. So I stopped nursing. Looking back I wish I had continued nursing them in the mornings, evenings and on weekends. I'm not so sure now, being older and wiser if they truly were completely done with the breast, or if I just felt rejected and decided to stop altogether. (mommy guilt you know) Anyhow, if I had it to do over again, I would have continued to at least offer my breast until they were both one year old.

My little 4 month old will probably nurse until he starts college. (kidding) He just loves it and won't take a bottle at all. This time around, I don't have to work full time outside of the home so he isn't given enough bottle time to not want to nurse in favor of the bottle. He won't take it anyways, and there is no reason to force the issue.

If you are working full time and are tired of pumping, keep these things in mind. I don't know how old your baby is so I am going to cover the bases here, so bare with me.

0-3 months - If you are a mommy who has to return to work during the first three months, I know how hard this will be for you and every effort you make to breastfed your baby is admirable. Returning before your baby is three months of age is heart wrenching at times, and your body is not quite ready either so your level of exhaustion will be intensified.

If you are a mommy who is choosing to return to work before three months, please reconsider. The first three months are precious, and so critical in establishing a good milk supply, and you will never get this time with your little miracle back. It is a one time gift, that passes in what seems like the blink of an eye.

OK, pumping at work during the three months - it is critical that you pump every 3 hours and that you attempt to empty each breast. You can do this in as little 20 minutes, or if you are like me, it may take up to 45 minutes and then you still won't be sure your breasts are empty. (I was and still am a lousy pumper) I know this sounds like a big commitment, but I can't think of anything more worthwhile. Here are some tips for you...

Do not try to work while pumping. Leave your stacks of reports, emails, new hire applications, research material, or whatever you have, behind. Trying to work while pumping will keep you in the wrong frame of mind. It will take longer for your milk to let down, longer to empty your breasts, and raise your frustration level.

Do bring a picture of your baby, make a point to take several deep cleansing breaths(this really does work), put your feet up if possible, close your eyes and think about your baby. Imagine the way he feels, the way he smells, the sounds that he makes when he is hungry. Whenever you feel the need, look at the photo of your baby. *Have someone take a picture of you feeding your baby with his little face and your breast making up a majority of the photograph. This is a real mood booster for pumping*

If you have a busy, on your feet job that will not allow for two extended break periods, my suggestions are...

Take them anyways. Be firm with your co-workers and your supervisors that you will be combining your breaks periods (typically by law you are entitled to a 30 minute lunch period and 2 - 15 minute breaks during an eight hour work day. This totals the magic number of 60 minutes) and splitting them into two equal break every three hours. Provide information from the Internet if necessary supporting your argument that you are doing what is best for your baby. Do not let anyone make you feel guilty. If any of your co-workers have a problem with your decisions, oh well. There will come a time that they themselves, will need understanding, time away or something of that nature, and the very folks that roll their eyes and gossip behind your back, will most likely be the same people who don't blink an eye taking care of their own needs when the situation presents itself.

Every place of employment has the martyr who raised 12 children, worked full time, was never late to work or took a sick day. I am sure you know someone like this. But just wait until she wakes up one morning and her bunions hurt. Oh yaah, you won't be seein' the whites of her eyes for three days and when you do, it will be with a doctor's note documenting her medical emergency. (By the way, all these individuals suffer from the same incurable disease called "sofullofsh*t")

I am speaking to you from my heart, based on my own personal work experience. So if I sounded harsh - GOOD! My writing is accurately conveying my feelings on this particular subject.

If you are still convinced that you just cannot take two pumping breaks during your break, then take one. Pump as much as you can, and nurse as much as you can when you are with your baby. There is such a thing called reverse cycle nursing, and your baby may be one that takes on this behavior. If not, and your milk supply isn't quite up to snuff because of the limited pumping time during your work day, supplement if you need to without guilt. Any breastmilk your baby is getting is pure gold. And any time spent nursing is priceless. But whatever you do, don't give up!

To be Continued...

Last But Not Least- I Tried It Before And ...

I have heard this statement so many times. It seems that the women who have the most reasons for not breastfeeding are the ones who have tried it once, and did not succeed. Here are the statements I have heard most often.

I tried it before and - My baby just couldn't do it.

As my motto goes, Babies are Born to Breastfeed. A healthy full term infant can and will breastfeed. However, breastfeeding is a skill that you, the mommy person, must coach and assist your baby to do properly. Most babies need very little of either, because their natural instincts guide them to your breast the moment they are born. But still, a new mommy, unsure of herself and her ability to breastfeed will be of little help to a crying, frustrated infant. This is why it is so important that you, the owner of the Super Boobs, must educate yourself prior to delivery and surround yourself with supportive, experienced breastfeeding mothers and/or lactation consultants. Please take the time to visit the La Leache League website for links to local consultants, meetings and endless advice and resources. There are also some wonderful books available for you to read while waiting for your baby. My favorite is the The Womanly Art of Breastfeeding: Seventh Revised Edition (La Leche League International Book).

Babies are built to breastfeed, from their flat little chins, to their adorable turned up noses, to their strong rooting reflex that can be seen just moments after birth. Be confident that your baby will breastfeed. He was not constructed for a bottle, he was built for your breasts.

I tried it before and - My nipples were to flat/inverted

Proof that God has a very good sense of humor are a woman's breasts. Let's face it girls, the only way to get two perfectly round, symmetrical boobies with fully erect nipples, that we have all seen in the movies (for about 15 seconds on the star's body double) is to pay for them. And believe you me, that $5000 dollar bra filler is sounding better every day. However, I have quite an attachment to my girls as they have serviced my children well. So I am unsure if I will ever alter them by surgical means.

The reality is, most women have something about their breasts they don't like. To low, to high(what the *&#???), to big, to small. To floppy, to lop sided, and yes, nipples that seem to flat or nipples that appear to be insecure and hiding from the world (aka inverted).

When I was expecting my first child, I was absolutely determined to breastfeed him. However, I mistakenly believed that I had to have something resembling a large pencil eraser popping out of each breast to be successful. So... I started reading and asking everyone I could about what to do about flat nipples. The solution I discovered were plastic cones for my bra. A wonderful little device that created a vacuum situation inside my bolder holder to gently draw out my nipples and ready them for my baby. Not only did they work, but I had great fun with my Madonna impression for about six weeks. Yes, you to ladies, can enjoy the amazing Hoover experience inside your bra by clicking this link: SUCK 'EM OUT. As you will see, the cones/shields are relatively inexpensive, and now come in a much more natural shape. Sorry to disappoint if you were looking forward to finding your inner "Material Girl". Turns out I had nothing to worry about. My breasts were custom made for my baby, and we did just fine.

Babies have a way of getting what they need. Keep in mind it isn't just the nipple that your baby will be latching on too. Its the whole package, nipple and areola. There will come a time when you will discover just how true this statement is, because it isn't uncommon for an older baby to just suckle directly on the nipple. This is fine once you have toughened up a bit, but be careful about this the first few weeks as this can cause soreness.

I tried It Before And - My nipples were so sore I couldn't continue...

This is a subject I feel strongly about because of my most recent experience. There are many reason why your nipples will get sore. Let's talk about a few.

Your Baby May be Tongue Tied

My little boy is four months old. He is my third baby. I was expecting my nipples to toughen up quickly. However, I became very raw and inflamed and continued to get worse as he got older. This of course is not normal. My nipples were so bad that I even came down with a yeast infection. My nipples looked like bright red traffic cones and it wasn't funny. (it's OK to laugh now)

I knew I was doing everything right. Danny was thriving, gaining weight well, and seemed satisfied. I am an experienced breastfeeding mom and was confident his latch was correct. But my nipples continued to be raw and painful. And the yeast infection would not go away. I was at my wits end. I started doing some research on line, and came across an article about a problem called "tongue tie". So, I went over to my baby, looked in his mouth and BINGO! He was tongue tied. I knew without a doubt this had to be the problem. Let me explain a bit -

Tongue Tie simply means that the frenulum under my babies tongue was to short and attached to the tip of my babies tongue. Therefore, he could not place his tongue far enough under my nipple to correctly suckle. This was the cause for my extreme soreness. The Solution? A simple and quick clip at the pediatrician's office. After the clip my baby latched right on, stopped fussing and my nipples healed completely in five days.

I realize that not all latching problems are due to tongue tie, but I can't help but wonder how many go undiagnosed. Our pediatrician didn't catch it, nor did anyone in the hospital. And a baby with tongue tie generally does not have issues with bottle feeding. Therefore the problem is diagnosed later when the tight, short frenulum interferes with proper speech development.

Moral of the story, check your baby's frenulum. Or specifically ask someone to check it for you in the hospital before you go home. Tongue Tie is hereditary, but my husband and I have yet to discover anyone in our family with the condition. So don't assume anything. CHECK YOUR BABIES MOUTH. Your nipples will thank you.

Mastitis

Mastitis happens when one of your milk duct is clogged and bacteria sets up there and causes an infection. Mastitis does hurt and can make you feel like poo. The important thing is to keep nursing your baby on the infected side as much as you can. This will keep your ducts empty and prevent further infection. Mastitis is a perfect example of why you should educate yourself as much as possible. If caught quickly, mastitis is easily treated and goes away quickly. Symptoms include a red, warm area on your breasts and a general feeling of Blah :(

Now don't think for a minute that by bottle feeding you will avoid Mastitis. This infection starts in a clogged milk duct, and no one has more clogged milk ducts the first few days post partum then a bottle feeding mother.


Yeast Infection

This has to be by far, one of the most painful infections to contract while nursing. Unfortunately it's quite common. I know you might only associate yeast with the type that you get in your Hanes, but yeast tends to have a hay day growing on a new mom's tender nipples for several reason:

* Many mothers have to have a course of antibiotics before, during or after delivery for a variety of medical reasons. While antibiotics destroy bad bacteria, they will also destroy the good. Therefore leaving your body susceptible to a yeast field day.

* Yeast love sugar and a nice moist area to grow; and of course the milk sugars in your breastmilk will provide yeasts with a nice food supply, and the moist insides of a new mother's bra or nursing pad can create the perfect environment for a yeast family reunion bigger then any thrown by the Jackson's.

* Yeast tend to attack compromised parts of the body. New nursing mom's may have cracks in their nipples (even tiny ones you may not see) that provide a breeding ground for yeast.

* Yeast loves to show up like a big bread truck full of your in-laws when the body is weakened from stress or illness. And no one is more stressed then a new mother. Pushing another human being out of your body, and then caring for that being around the clock while entertaining family members, friends and neighbors is enough to put anyone in the ground.

Side Note: LOVE LOVE LOVE Having babies!

The good news is, yeast can be treated. Not as easily as Mastitis I'm afraid, but it will go away. Please do some research on treating yeast of the nipples and get to know the signs and symptoms so you can stop the bread rolls before they rise. Here's a link to get you started - Treating the Muffin Man On Your Super Boobs.

Your Baby's Latch May Be Incorrect Due To Improper Support

I still hold to my belief that babies will latch the way they need to instinctively when positioned properly. I strongly feel that the main reason for a baby suckling incorrectly is improper support of either the baby or your breast.

If your breasts are large like mine are, and not to high and mighty as mine aren't, it works out to be more important to properly support your breast then your baby. Holding your baby securely is a no brainer. Most mothers will do this regardless. However, large, milk filled breast are heavy. When you are holding your breast to latch your baby on you are supporting the weight in your hand right? OK, baby latches on you get comfy, let go of your breasts and, gravity works girls! Your breast fall down, your nipple slips out of your baby's mouth a bit, and what started as a perfect latch on becomes a painful feeding right on your tender nipple. This is what I believe to be one of the top reasons for sore nipples. Not a baby's incorrect suckle. I am guilty of this infraction myself.

As I am sure you will learn if you haven't already, a baby must compress the area around the nipple to properly feed and stimulate your breasts to produce an adequate amount of milk for your baby. By suckling this way, your nipples will not receive the brunt of the baby's powerful suck. So, be sure to properly support those impressive super boobs until your baby is bigger. Until this time, simply use a throw pillow, Boppy, rolled up blanket or simply your hand to support your heavy breasts while baby feeds. (At 4 months of age, my baby is now tall enough to comfortably fit on my lap and nurse without my worrying to much about supporting my breasts.) I also encourage you to do your homework and experiment with a variety of breastfeeding positions. You will find one you love, and you will also reap the benefits of stimulating different parts of your nipple. This really will help you to avoid becoming excessively sore on one area of your nipple. My favorite has always been the side lying position. I love nursing my babies laying down. Regardless of what position you choose, support your Super Boobs!

If you're thinking, " Gee, this sounds complicated", it really isn't. Bottle feeding a baby is always a two hand handed maneuver and sometimes breastfeeding starts out requiring two hands during the feed as well.

Ladies, you didn't sign up for a pleasure cruise. Raising a baby is hard work, requiring self sacrifice, patience, determination, love and humor. The rewards of watching you baby thrive are greater then any I can adequately describe to you here. Hang in there and prepare yourself for the wonderful world of being a Mommy.

Breastfeeding is Gross

Believe it or not, some people do think this. These are probably the same people that think mini skirts are scandalous, rap music is Satan's music, and alcohol is the root of all evil.

For the rest of us, short skirt lovin', P Daddy listenin', glass of wine counts as our 8 ounces of water a day folks, there is just nothing gross about it.

Breasts are beautiful. Just ask my huband. (a bonified boob man) They are an incredible dual device that any woman should be proud of. They never go out of fashion and they always match what you are wearing. They are the ultimate fashion accessorie that can be worn up or down, smashed in or popped out, and revealed in all their glory or dressed up to leave just enough to stir wonder and awe in a majority of the male population.

What a new puppy leaves behing the couch is gross, the smell of your husbands socks is gross, really old men wearing a speedo is gross. Feeding your baby the best food money CANNOT buy with your amazing super boobs is not gross.

And if anyone dare tell you different, stand up reeeeally straight, putting your breasts at their best advantage point and tell them to wake up and smell the breastmilk.