Breastfeeding will interfere with my sex life...

There is a rumor out there that I'm sure some of you have heard. The rumor goes likes this...

You have finally reached that moment after giving birth when the doctor has given the green light for you to resume "relations". So, you rush home, take a shower, wash and style your hair, dig out your makeup from under the stack of nursing pads and hemorrhoid creams that now line your bathroom counter. Next, you decide to slip into something nice. Not sexy, because none of that crap fits anymore. But something that doesn't scream "hey everyone, I just had a baby!"
Then you try very hard to get the baby to sleep right before your husband walks through the door. And when he does, there you are, all prettied up with a big smile on your face.

- Ladies, please don't be disappointed if instead of catching your cue and locking you in a passionate kiss, he simply says hey, smacks your butt and heads for the bathroom. Sometimes men need a little help after thinking about dead chickens and taking cold showers for 4-6 weeks. -

Anyhow, once he has figured out why you are smiling, you both undress, hop into bed, start gettin' it on, and suddenly, your super boobs open up like a tropical rainstorm and ruin the mood.

Can I just tell you in all honesty? This has never happened to me. I was terrified it would but it never has. Let me tell you why.

First of all, leaky boobs are really only a problem for the first few weeks. You're breasts figure out how much milk your baby needs, and will adjust accordingly. My baby is now 3 months old and I don't even wear nursing pads in my bra anymore. And I no longer sleep in one either.

Second of all, during the time that your breasts are at risk for leakage, they will be so heavy and tender you wouldn't dream of doing anything, including sex, without wearing your soft nursing bra with nursing pads in place. Therefore, if you are one of the lucky women who actually enjoy sex the first few weeks post partum, and your husband is successful in makin' it rain, you won't have to worry.

Now, don't think for a minute that by bottle feeding you will escape the big tender melon boob period. Because you will NOT. I have never personally experienced what it is like to let my milk dry up cold turkey, but I have seen other women go through it. And it seems to me, if you're willing to go through all that torture to bottle feed your baby, why would you not endure a few weeks of tenderness and leakage to give yourbaby the best milk on the planet? And I firmly believe that the tender boobs you get the first few weeks while nursing, cannot be as horrible as the swollen, lumpy, red and inflammed breasts of the bottle feeding mother. And NO, they do not give shots anymore to dry up your milk. (just incase your mother told you about that)

The true reality is, by the time that your baby settles into a sleep pattern that will actually allow you to have uninterrupted, mind blowing sex, (you know, the fantasy, tropical rainstrom sex we talked about earlier?) your amazing super boobs will be much more cooperative.